


Naruto's Road to (Non) Hokage

by Incognito01



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Attempt at Humor, BAMF Nara Shikamaru, Cute Uzumaki Naruto, Fluff and Crack, Future Fic, Fuuinjutsu, Hokage Uzumaki Naruto, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama & Uzumaki Naruto Friendship, Naruto is so done, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Poor Life Choices, The horror of paperwork, Time Travel, Uzumaki Naruto Being an Idiot, Young Uzumaki Naruto
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:13:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25707226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Incognito01/pseuds/Incognito01
Summary: Future AU. Crackfic.In which a 12-year old Naruto (not-so) accidentally time-traveled and met his Future Hokage self.ORThe story where Hokage Naruto is so sick of paperwork that he'll do anything to avoid it. Yes, even to the point of sabotaging his younger self’s dream.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi & Uzumaki Naruto, Konoha 11 & Sai & Uzumaki Naruto, Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama & Uzumaki Naruto, Nara Shikamaru & Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Uzumaki Naruto & Everyone
Comments: 27
Kudos: 159





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Madame Lunaaa](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Madame+Lunaaa).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Everyone!
> 
> Thank you so much for the support and love to my other fics. I know I should start updating my other stories, but I'm really kinda invested with this one. As thankful as I am with my the work-from-home arrangements, this also meant our workload literally doubled, sometimes even tripled. The stress and everything... well it led to this. Hopefully, you'll enjoy it. Hahaha. Happy reading!

It's been…

**Three years, seven months,** and **twenty-one days** since Naruto had taken the Hat and officially started his duties as the Seventh Hokage of Konoha. 

This roughly translated to **1,328 days, 31,872 hours,** and **1,912,320 minutes** of _signing_ paperworks. But really, who's counting? Definitely not Naruto. After all, once he’s finished with his current stack (around 3-4 reports remaining), the Blonde could finally get his well-deserved vacation and be free of these _bloody_ papers.

[A few weeks earlier, Shikamaru proposed that Naruto could take a two-week vacation _when_ (read: _if_ ) he finished all of his paperworks. He’ll be damned if he let such an offer go. The Blonde even made sure to have a _written document_ of the proposal just for safety purposes.] 

When he was already in his last report, the Hokage grinned ear to ear.

_Freedom, Here I come._ He inwardly cheered. Unfortunately, before the Blonde could even put his pen down, another pile of paperwork was dropped on his desk courtesy of his advisor-from-Hell (aka Shikamaru).

"Naruto, Here's another batch." Shikamaru announced, completely unrepentant despite the Hokage’s horrified expression. Without missing a beat, he added. “These reports need to be done by tomorrow morning at the latest.”

Predictably, this broke the Blonde from his stupor. Slamming his hands at his desk, he stood up as he protested. “WHAT! This was supposed to be the last one!” Naruto pointed at the stack of papers he just finished. Crossing his hands, he (read: petulantly) firmly objected. "No. I'm going on a vacation. We had an agreement, Shika. None of you could stop me. _I'm taking a break_. You guys can handle it."

The other occupants of the room (aka the rest of Team 7) were watching the duo in amusement. They knew Shikamaru could handle the Hokage’s tantrums. After all, _he always did._ Still, it never failed to provide great entertainment.

“Of course. I remember the deal, Hokage-sama” The Nara lazily replied, the edge of lips twitching almost indiscernibly (keyword: almost). 

Naruto’s cerulean eyes narrowed. He recognized that _twitch._ Adding up the fact that the other suffixed his title with a ‘-sama’. Shikamaru was preventing a _smug smile_. This could only mean that he fell right into the Nara’s (aka The Devil’s) trap.

_Oh, Hell No._ The Blonde made sure he’d got everything covered - the meetings, mission assignments, and (of course) the _goddamned_ paperwork. Naruto even finished the reports that weren't due til' the _next month_. Just to ensure that _nothing_ could ever impede his plans. 

When the Hokage was about to show (read: shove) the _agreement_ to his Advisor's face, the latter reasoned. 

"But--" Shikamaru drawled "--if I recall it correctly, the deal stated that _you can only take a leave when you've finished all of your reports._ Seeing that another batch came in--" the Nara patted the stack he just delivered to emphasize his point,"--Well...I'd start signing these papers if you're still planning on that vacation." He nonchalantly suggested. 

Despite his usual lazy demeanor, Naruto knew the other was smirking. Shikamaru, the devil’s incarnate (nobody could change his opinion otherwise), definitely planned this all out. The Nara purposely delivered the papers at the last minute just to make sure he _stays_.

_Fuck No.'_ His mind instantly retaliated. Come hell or high water, Naruto’s leaving for his vacation _today_ , even if he has to _fight_ his way to it.

“Don’t even think about it, Dope.” Sasuke warned, his eyes narrowing as if the Uchiha managed to read the Blonde’s thoughts.

“Maa--” Kakashi began as he flipped another page of his novel “--no fighting in the Tower, _Boys_.” He commented in a reprimanding tone, earning dirty looks from the duo (aka Naruto and Sasuke). Paying no heed, he added. “Naruto-kun, just be a _good Hokage_ and finish your paperwork.”

Unsurprisingly, a vein appeared in the Blonde’s temple. However, before he could explode at all of them, Sakura (unhelpfully) reminded.

“Kakashi-sensei’s right. Plus--” the Medic Nin voiced as she clipped her nails “--you’ll just destroy this _entire_ building if you fought, creating more paperworks.” She pointed out, which effectively halted the Blonde’s runaway attempt.

Glancing at his old team (read: useless companions), the Hokage wearily inquired “Why are you guys even _here?_ ”

In return, Naruto received varying responses from his (unwanted) companions. 

"Hn." Sasuke huffed, rolling his eyes at the Blonde. 

Naruto's eyebrow twitched in irritation. After all, he heard the Uchiha's message loud and clear, which was: Your-question-was-so-utterly-stupid,-I'm-not-even-gonna-bother-answering-it. 

"Dickless-sama--" Sai began monotonously.

Again, the Hokage's eyebrow _twitched._ ‘Why the hell would the ex-root member even add an honorific if he's just gonna call me with _that_ nickname?’ Naruto sarcastically thought. 

“--we’re your Anbu.” Sai gestured an arm at Sasuke, emphasizing his point. “We have to be here to protect you.” 

Naruto almost rolled his eyes (keyword: almost) at his rubbish. The Hokage’s positive that the only protection he’ll ever need (at this point) was from _his paperworks_. 

"Why, I'm here to provide guidance, my dear pupil of mine." Kakashi exuberantly exclaimed, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

_This time_. Naruto did roll his eyes at his sensei’s bullshit. As if the latter could give any counsel. The Rokudaime practically dumped half of his workload to the Blonde in a stupid excuse of training. With a dry look, he glanced at the last member of Team 7 (aka Sakura), waiting for her response. 

(Meanwhile, Shikamaru was observing them with weird fascination, _absolutely pleased_ as he noted the Blonde’s reactions.) 

"Well...I've got some free time." Sakura shrugged, completely ignorant of the Blonde’s growing annoyance. 

To Naruto’s ears, all of their nonsensical explanations (read: excuses) meant: We’ve-got-some-spare-time-(unlike-you)-and-we-decided-to-rub-it-in-your-face-just-for-fun. And... another vein appeared in his temple. 

_Okay. Calm down._ The Blonde berated himself as he sat down. After all, Sakura was right. Any attempt to escape will undeniably lead to a fight, adding up to his current load. As a Hokage, Naruto knew when to retreat. Shikamaru and the others might have won this fight, but this was just the beginning. Grabbing a piece of report, he reluctantly resumed his work.

“ _Fine._ I’ll do it.” Naruto did not need to look at them to know all of his companions were bearing a _triumph_ smile. “And I don’t care if you guys decided to hang around or leave--” Naruto honestly preferred the latter, “--just let me finish my work in peace.”

Yawning, Shikamaru remarked. “Now that I’ve accomplished what I came here for, I’ll be leaving.” Naruto shot him a glare in response.

But before he left, Shikamaru was wearing the infamous Nara smirk (read: condescending grin) as he remarked, “And thanks for your hard work, _Hokage-sama._ ” 

At that, Naruto despaired as he (begrudgingly) signed _more_ papers.

* * *

_A week later…_

Naruto was still stuck in his office, doing his _God-forsaken paperworks_. 

If anyone wondered why, the answer was really simple. It’s because his Devil-of-an-Advisor (aka Shikamaru) religiously dumped new stacks of reports even before he was half-way done with the previous one. And the Evil Genius did it every single _fucking_ time. Like what the Nara’s about to do right now.

“Naruto--” Shikamaru began as he entered the room with his apprentice (aka Akamaru) following in tow, carrying his new pile of workload.

At the mention of his name, the Hokage groaned. _Not again._ He mentally cried. The cause of his distress, on the other hand, continued on his task, totally indifferent. Meanwhile, Konohamaru went to the corner to arrange the papers.

“--can you finish this stack by Friday? If not, just hand it over by next week.” Shikamaru casually instructed before turning to his apprentice. “Konohamaru, return to the office once you’re done. We still have some files to sort for today.” 

After receiving a nod from his apprentice, Shikamaru left the tower, one hand in his pocket while the other waved in goodbye.

* * *

For someone who claimed to be lazy, he sure was _diligent_ in ordering him around. _That wicked slave driver._ Naruto inwardly lamented, glaring at the empty spot of the Nara. He’s seriously regretting having the other as his advisor.

Looking at his new pile of workload, the Hokage briefly debated blasting them with his infamous Rasengan. But immediately decided against it. After all, the last time he used explosive tags to eradicate _these_ reports. It _freaking_ came back and multiplied faster than White Zetsu’s clones. 

(That was definitely a horrifying sight to witness. Naruto vowed to never make such attempts again).

With no other options left, the Hokage asked the question that’s been bugging him for quite some time now. Out of the blue (and desperation), the Blonde inquired.

“Hey, Sasuke?” Naruto called, which earned a quirked eyebrow from the Uchiha. The other occupants of the room (aka Konohamaru and Kakashi) also glanced at them curiously. Putting his pen down, the Blonde solemnly looked at his teammate as he offered. 

“Still interested in being the Hokage? I’ll give you the Hat. I’ll even _fight_ anyone who disagrees.” Without missing a beat, he added. “Yes. That includes _you_ , Konohamaru.” The Blonde emphasized, sending the other a pointed look. 

“Are you _shitting_ me?” Sasuke snapped incredulously.

Shaking his head sideways, Naruto replied. “No. It was an honest offer, Teme. Like passing the Will of Fire--”

“--Naruto-kun, that’s not really how it works, you know.” Kakashi (un)helpfully supplied while Konohamaru furiously nodded in agreement, which the Hokage effortlessly ignored.

“--In fact, I’ll hand it to you right, _now_.” Naruto stood up as he tried to hand the Hat (keyword: tried) his elusive teammate.

“ _Stop_.” Sasuke instantly cut off, putting a hand up to the Blonde’s direction. “Leave me out of your insanity.”

With that, the Uchiha body-flickered away, leaving nothing but dust in his wake.

* * *

In hindsight, Naruto really should have expected such reaction. After all, that was _Uchiha Sasuke_.

But...

‘Oh well. It was still worth a shot.’ The Blonde silently reasoned. Besides, Sasuke did announce his desire to be a Hokage during the Fourth Shinobi War. 

However, with his last option gone, it only meant that Naruto was _stuck_ with an empty holder of his Hat and paperworks...lots and lots of paperworks.

_Damn._

* * *

_Later that Night..._

In the comfort of his bed, Naruto stared aimlessly at the ceiling as he contemplated where he had gone wrong in his life.

After the whole incident with Madara, everything was finally falling into place - There was peace among the Five Nations; The Bijuus were free to roam around, no longer threatened to be controlled and misused for their powers; Above all, Naruto managed to keep his promise with Itachi and bring Sasuke back to Konoha, kicking-and-screaming (literally). 

(The latter even became the Head of his Anbu and the infamous Shadow Hokage, only with no desk duties. Naruto bitterly noted.)

_Oh Yeah._ He also became the Seventh Hokage.

In other words, it was _paradise._ The world was in good hands and all he could ever dream of was slowly turning into reality.

But alas, all good things must come to an end. Paperworks, the _bane of his existence_ , had to enter the picture... like a prickly thorn in his side, forever meant to torment him. 

Naruto could totally understand why the Legendary Sannins (with exception of Orochimaru) avoided the title like a plague. It was a fucking _curse_. If only he knew back then. The Blonde audibly lamented. Naruto was positive he would’ve followed his Godfather’s footsteps in a heartbeat. Even today, the idea of a wandering sage did sound tempting. 

‘It’s truly a shame nobody could turn back time.’ Naruto regretfully mused.

Wait a minute...

The Blonde abruptly sat up, his brain working overtime. Maybe time-traveling was believed to be far-fetched because nobody had managed to make it work, _yet._ The closest was the space-time jutsus of the Niidaime, his father, and Kakashi-sensei/ Obito.

Which means… it was totally _not_ impossible. Naruto grinned a Cheshire smile. 

(Inside him, Kurama rolled his eyes at the Blonde’s another ridiculous attempt to escape his paperwork. How Naruto could come up with these absurd ideas would forever be beyond him. At this point, his Jinchuuriki should really have learned his lesson. But… Oh well. Kurama was never the one to deny a chance to laugh at the Blonde’s face when it all failed, _miserably_.)

Naruto had always accomplished unimaginable feats. After all, the Blonde wasn’t known as the No. 1 most unpredictable ninja for nothing. If it meant finally being free of _those_ paperworks, then Naruto will even defy the _odds of time_. 

He was so getting rid of those horrible reports _permanently_ , even if it's the last thing he'll do.

* * *

**_To Be Continued..._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> Yes. I know, this fic was a literal manifestation of my frustrations with reports. Hahahah. Anyways, how was it? Hopefully, the humor was right and everything. Let me know your thoughts about it. I truly appreciate all of your comments/ reviews.
> 
> Thank you and always stay safeee.
> 
> PS. To my friend: who wouldn't give her username. Be thankful I didn't add your last name. HAHAAH
> 
> PPS. For the Math peeps, please don't kill me if I made a mistake. Huhuahhaa. Math and I had never seen each other eye-to-eye. HAHAHAHAH


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Naruto begins to create his time-travelling Jutsu while the rest of the Gang investigates.
> 
> OR 
> 
> The time when Naruto bested his Advisor. Or did he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Everyone,
> 
> I'm not dead...yet. I truly apologize for the long wait. Work is... Hahahuhu. Anyways, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR COMMENTS AND KUDOS! It really inspired me every time I re-read it. I'm really sorry I wasn't able to reply to the comments as I used to. 
> 
> Hopefully, you'll enjoy it. Happy reading!

_ Notes: _

[Naruto’s thoughts while writing his plans OR when his protests were ignored in the background]

* * *

_Recap:_

_After all, the Blonde wasn’t known as the No. 1 most unpredictable ninja for nothing. If it meant finally being free from all those paperworks, then Naruto will even defy the odds of time._

_He was so getting rid of all paperworks permanently, even if it’s the last thing he’ll do._

* * *

Hastily grabbing a pen and paper, Naruto began to formulate a plan. So… 

Basically, the goal he had on mind was really simple. 

Travel back in time. Make sure to NEVER ever end up as a Hokage. Then, proceed to save the world (again). 

_Oh._ He could also have his _well-deserved_ vacation the moment he's in the past.

Nobody's gonna bother him with anything. Shikamaru would be too _lazy_ , Sasuke too _vengeful,_ Kakashi-sensei…too _mopey_? While everyone else would just be their old crazy self. 

_Now, wasn’t that just awesome?_ This was definitely his most brilliant plan as of yet (or not). 

Going back, the real question Naruto had to figure out was the _How -_ how should he go about his plan? 

Fuinjutsu was a tricky technique. And time was even trickier. 

Since paperwork had pretty much (read: totally) fried the last of his functional brain cells for today, Naruto decided to ask his good ol' companion, who always claimed to be omniscient with his thousand years of experience, for help. 

"Kurama--" He called out "--any ideas about this? I'm open for any suggestions."

In return, Naruto was met with _absolute silence._

The Blonde visibly rolled his eyes at the Fox. Kurama was obviously ignoring him. Well, if the Kyuubi refused to come out the _nice way,_ Naruto guessed he had to do this his usual way. 

_So the annoying way it is then._

“Oi, You lazy, old furball--” Naruto taunted “--stop pretending to be asleep and help me.”

The Blonde felt the other twitched in annoyance. Still, Kurama refused to budge. He guessed the Fox just needed a little more coaxing (read: insults). Mustering his most annoying whine, Naruto demanded.

“Stupid Fox. Come out and _be useful_ \--” the Kyuubi began to growl “--And don’t you dare use the it’s-a-waste-of-chakra excuse. You’ve got trillions of chakra to _spare_.”

Instantly, a lion-sized Kurama materialized, snarling at him. “What the hell do you want, _brat._ ” The Kyuubi barked.

Rolling his eyes, Naruto replied. “You already know what I want, Kurama.”

Remembering the Blonde’s ridiculous time-travel plan, the Kyuubi howled in laughter.

* * *

_Three minutes later..._

Kurama was still _laughing._

At this point, Naruto was sending him a dry look. When the Kyuubi’s laughter began to die down, he sarcastically inquired. “Are you done?”

“Brat--” Kurama started in-between his sniggers “--don’t even bother. Just accept your fate. You’re stuck with your paperwork until you’re all wrinkles and grey.” He ended with a feral smirk.

_Over his dead fucking body._

Naruto would rather kill himself than spend the rest of his life behind desks and reports. In fact, the only problem with that plan was Sakura-chan will surely find a way to _resuscitate_ him. And when she does, Shikamaru and Sasuke will definitely tag-team to make his hellish life even… well, _hellier_ (If that was a word, Naruto didn’t really care much at this point). In other words, dying was certainly not an option. 

Despite the Kyuubi’s insufferable attitude, Naruto’s hunch told him that Kurama had a vague idea how to make his plan work. The Blonde just needed to give him a _little motivation_ to cooperate. 

And so, that's what he'll do. 

Shaking his head somberly, he muttered. “Ahh. So not even the _Great Kurama_ , with his thousands worth of experiences, had the knowledge to help me.” 

Instantly, Kurama’s smirk fell, frowning at his Jinchuuriki.

But of course, Naruto wasn’t done. With a very disappointed sigh, he added. "My bad. I shouldn't have expected you to have the _answers_."

As expected, Kurama’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “Naruto--” he growled “--you dare to _question_ my greatness and intellect?” The Kyuubi roared.

The Blonde simply shrugged in response. Inwardly, Naruto grinned. Kurama just fell into his trap, _hook, line and sinker._ Any minute now and he’s positive the Fox will no doubt tell him what he needed. 

With a gruff condescending tone, he proudly declared. “Stupid Brat! The key point in any Space-Time Jutsus is _the destination._ ” 

The Blonde’s eyes immediately flickered with understanding as his mouth formed a small ‘o’. Giddily, he complimented “You’re a genius, Kurama! Thanks!” 

The Fox, on the other hand, simply laid comfortably on his floor, absolutely pleased with his Jinchuuriki’s response.

(Later, Kurama will realize how easily the Brat manipulated him. He's blaming it all on the _Nara_. That Advisor of him was definitely a bad influence.)

 _Okay._ So first, Naruto had to decide the _when_ and the _where_. 

As he reminisced the events of his life to find the perfect destination point, the one lesson he learned from the war, which never failed to resolve conflicts, briefly popped into his mind. 

_“Always start from the roots.”_

Which means... 

The Blonde had to go back to the _Academy days_ , the time when he was just a (naive) student claiming to be _the Hokage._ This thought made him scrunch his face in distaste. 

Looking back, Naruto had to admit that doing everything all over again, especially the saving the world part, was a bit _too troublesome._

However, at the mere memory of his Devil-of-an-Advisor's catchphrase, the Hokage's motivation multiplied _ten-folds_. 

Objectively, all he really had to do was 1) turn into a child _again_ in a Village that absolutely hated him, 2) become an awesome Genin, 3) drag Sasuke's ass back to Konoha, 4) make sure Baa-chan becomes the _Godaime_ , 5) save Gaara (another traitor) from Akatsuki, 6) defeat the Akatsuki and Madara, and lastly 7) prevent the resurrection of Kaguya or just prevent the Fourth Shinobi War in general. 

All things considered, it was absolutely a small price to pay in the expense of paperwork. Seven steps. A total walk in a park. Easy Peasy.

_What a minute..._

If Naruto’s already gonna have a total re-do, why bother following the initial timeline when he could totally _change_ it all for the better? 

He could have a _paperwork-free life_ and be an awesome Shinobi, maybe a Jounin, an Anbu or even a wandering Sage (Honestly, the Blonde didn’t care. Ranks didn’t matter to him as long as he wasn’t the _Hokage_ ). And the best part? Naruto could also prevent some deaths along the way like Haku, Ero-Sennin or even the other Jinchuurikis. 

In other words, _it was absolutely perfect._

A Cheshire cat grin graced on his lips. Excitedly, Naruto began to list the things he had to do. After all, he didn’t want to miss any important details.

**His Guide to a Paperwork-free Life**

  1. Travel back to the past
  2. Enjoy the first few weeks of freedom
  3. Denounce his dream of becoming a Hokage 
  4. Expose Danzo and his cult 



[And if it failed to put the old crook to his place, Naruto could always kill him. The Uchihas, well at least Sasuke and Itachi-san, deserved justice. It’s truly a shame he was too young to remember the details of the massacre. Maybe he could’ve gone even earlier to stop it.]

5\. Knock some sense to:

  * Baa-chan [Naruto’s gonna make sure she’ll stay as the _Kage_ until she finds a successor who’s not _him._ ]
  * Itachi-san



[He’s a _Konoha Hero_ , whether the older Uchiha wanted it or not. Plus, this will avoid all the Sasuke-as-Orochimaru’s-Minion-and-Missing-Nin. He might be his brother in all but blood, however, Naruto refused to deal with the Uchiha’s angsty, rebellion phase _again_. He already did it once. And in his humble opinion, _once_ was definitely more than enough to last a lifetime or two. 

In all honesty, the Blonde had already lost count how many times Sasuke _almost_ killed him just to make him stay away. Now that he wanted the Uchiha _away_ , his annoying (and overprotective) teammate wouldn’t give him a second _alone_. Even if it’s just to breathe some fresh air, a moment of privacy (read: chance to escape paperwork). 

_Yup._ Itachi-san can deal with his brother this time.]

  * Nagato and Karin 



[Truthfully, the female Uzumaki kinda _freaked_ him out with her obsessive and stalkerish tendencies. However, Naruto still believed that the Uzumakis need to stay together. Besides, a Good Nagato = Good Akatsuki. A very simple equation.]

  * Obito (aka Tobi) 



[Naruto knew the Uchiha still had his heart and ideals in the right place. He just got _brain-fucked_ by his crazy ancestor. More importantly, aside from his sensei needing a friend, he remembered that Obito dreamed to be a _Hokage_. 

The Blonde mentally grinned. Once the Uchiha was free from the evil clutches of his ancestor, Naruto will definitely recommend him as the successor of the Hat (aka sacrificial lamb).]

6\. Fix Gaara’s seal or Befriend all the Jinchuurikis and check their seals

[He should probably start with the Fourth Mizukage, another unfortunate victim of Madara, and end their civil war. Naruto hoped this would create a chain reaction, wherein both Zabuza and Haku won’t end up as Missing-Nins.

If it didn’t… Well, the Blonde could always save them along with the others.]

7\. Beware of Shikamaru [He's a devil in disguise. _Better be safe than sorry_.]

Note to self: If the _fucking_ position was still offered, run away as far as possible. Become a missing-Nin if needed. Just do whatever it takes to avoid the _Hat_ and the _paperworks._

Satisfied with his notes, the Blonde laid out a blank scroll as he reviewed some of his Sealing books. All the while, Kurama blissfully snoozed beside him.

And so, Naruto started creating his _ultimate_ jutsu, _the time-travelling seal_.

(Too bad. Naruto might be a fuuinjutsu master, someone who’s a whole new caliber on his own. However, he had forgotten how things _never_ really happened according to his plans.) 

* * *

_Sometime during the night...._

Naruto paused, remembering something important. 

Creating a Jutsu, particularly something as complicated as his time-travelling seal, would demand _a lot of time_ and attention, which he couldn’t afford due to his _fucking_ reports. Although he could have his shadow clones replace him, there’s no doubt that one of the Gang, most likely Shikamaru or Sasuke, will catch on. Also, the Hokage might need to stop his _daily_ attempts to escape his paperwork, which would definitely raise suspicions.

Not that Naruto was incapable of doing things simultaneously, he was perfectly adept with the art of multitasking. It's just that… He’d rather avoid _accidentally_ creating more paperwork.

[In the back of his mind, the Blonde begrudgingly acknowledged that _all_ his (failed) attempts did cause more paperwork.]

Anyways, he had to get the Devil (aka Shikamaru) and everyone else off his back lest he wanted them to foil his plans. 

A minute later, an idea popped into his mind. 

Naruto (ferally) grinned. 

_They’ll never see it coming._

* * *

_Two weeks later…_

As Shikamaru was cataloging the signed reports by the Hokage, there’s one thought running through the Genius' mind.

_It's too calm._

In all honesty, the Advisor had nothing against peace and quiet. On the contrary, he absolutely relished it. However--

“Shikamaru--” Sakura began as she entered the room. Sasuke trotted slowly behind her. “--we’ve brought the Hospital’s request for supplies. Could you run this to Naruto asap?” She asked, handing a couple of folders. 

At the sight of the grumbling Uchiha, Shikamaru inquired, an eyebrow arched. “Who’s guarding (read: babysitting) at the Tower?” 

Before the Sharingan User could utter a sound, the Medic Nin interjected. "Kakashi-sensei's usually there and it's--" 

"--the creepy face's (aka Sai) shift." 

"--anyways, I don't think he'll cause any trouble. Right, Sasuke-kun?" She inquired to which the Uchiha grunted in affirmation. 

_Not cause any trouble?_ Shikamaru mentally echoed. 

Now, Shikamaru was positive that his uneasy feeling wasn't just a product of his overthinking. 

_Something was definitely wrong._

“Sasuke--" the Advisor called, earning a quirked eyebrow from the Shinobi “--when was the last time Naruto _attempted_ an escape?”

"It's..." Sasuke scrunched his face in confusion before it was replaced by a look of understanding _"Shit."_

However, when the Uchiha was about to bolt out the room, he was stopped with a vice-like grip, courtesy of his Pink-Haired teammate. 

" _Wait_. Explain--" Sakura eyed the duo critically as she demanded, "--what did Naruto do this _time_?" 

"He's a _clone_." Sasuke explained, hissing the last word venomously. 

"But yesterday--" 

"--Naruto's clones had always been more durable." Shikamaru inserted, cutting the Medic-Nin's protests before adding, "However, it's still a theory. But knowing him, it's either he's luring us into a false sense of security for _something big_ or--" his irises gleamed calculatedly as he purposely drawled the words for emphasis "--we've been left with a _decoy_. Hence, the clone who's _obediently_ signing the paperworks.” 

At that, Sakura' s eyes widened in realization as she bolted out, the two raven-haired following close behind. 

* * *

_At the Tower…_

Naruto was simply minding his own business, signing stacks and piles of papers robotically with the Rokudaime by the window sill giggling like a teenage girl as he read his favorite novel. 

When suddenly, his office bursted open with cracks creeping on the sides as the door was _forcefully_ banged on the wall (a little too much), courtesy of his Pink-haired teammate.

(Naruto mentally whimpered as his mind began to process how _much paperwork_ that would take.)

And _thwacked._

Sakura punched him with her monstrous strength on the head, slamming the Hokage's face on the table, _hard_ , destroying the desk (and maybe his skull) while ruining some of his reports on the process. 

_Silence._

Everyone waited a full minute for the Blonde to puff into smoke.

But instead… 

Naruto twitched, groaning in pain as he sat up, blood dripping from his nose before demanding.

 _"What the hell was that for."_ The Hokage growled at his offenders.

“You’re...umm--” Sakura faltered, searching for the right words “--you’re actually _real?_ ” She exclaimed in complete-and-utter disbelief. 

At this point, even Sasuke and Shikamaru had to double-take as if attempting to discern if it was all a Genjutsu. Sending them an annoyed glare, the Hokage wiped the blood in his nose and fixed his clothes as he countered. 

“What makes you think I was a _clone._ ” He snapped, massaging the bump forming on his (poor) head.

_A beat._

"Sakura--" the Uchiha called, still staring unblinkingly at the Blonde "--did you hit the _Dope_ hard enough?" 

[Despite the throbbing pain, a vein popped in the Hokage's temple as he hissed. " _Why don't you try getting hit._ "] 

"I-I think I did--" the Medic-Nin hesitantly confirmed "--I mean, it did destroy the table." She warily pointed out, gesturing a hand towards the wrecked furniture and papers.

(In fact, how the floor managed to stay intact despite the impact it had sustained was another mystery of its own.)

[At that, the Hokage made an agonizing moan as he despaired over his desk and his ruined - slash - newly signed reports.]

Nevertheless, the Blonde’s (cold-blooded) teammate offered. “Should I try Amaterasu? Maybe burning the clone would do the trick?" Sasuke inquired with his Sharingan and Rinnegan both flaring.

[Instantly, Naruto snarled as he went on the defensive. There’s no way he’s going down _without a fight_ , especially with his plans already on the motion.]

“No. Wait.” Shikamaru interjected before commenting, “I think this might actually kill him.” He impartially observed. 

(Meanwhile, Kakashi put his Icha-Icha book away as he watched the scene in total glee, completely ignoring the fact that two of his students just attempted to murder the _Hokage._ But in his defense, his cute students always had a _unique_ way (read: by killing one another) of showing their affections. Besides, they never failed to amuse him with their absurdity.)

“ _You think?!_ ” Naruto ungracefully screeched.

And for the first time, the trio looked at him as if the Hokage… well, like he _wasn’t_ a fake.

“So...You’re not a clone.” Sasuke concluded tentatively.

"For the love of ramen, why do the three of you keep on saying _that_?" He demanded impatiently, shooting them an icy glare. 

This time, it was his female _abuser_ who gave a response. 

"It's just--" Sakura glanced at her companion, silently pleading for help. Receiving none, she sighed before continuing "--for the past two weeks, you were signing your papers _without complain_ so…umm--" the Hokage raised an eyebrow "--we thought you were a _clone_."

And _Silence_ …

Naruto just looked at them blankly, completely devoid of any emotions. 

* * *

“Kaka-sensei.” The Blonde called in his Hokage voice, causing the Silver-haired to straighten up as he met the other’s gaze. “Can you please look for Yamato-taichou? I need him to _fix_ some things _._ ” 

Everyone winced as their happy-go-lucky Hokage spat the word ‘fix’. Anyone in the right mind or at least with a sense of self-preservation knew that this was a _dangerous_ situation. 

After responding with a (stiff) nod, Kakashi disappeared (read: escaped) in a swirl of leaves, leaving the trio to their fate.

(After all, as much as Kakashi wanted to see the Blonde explode, he’s not gonna take any chances of being a _collateral damage_. Plus, adding Tenzo in the mix might just bring more entertainment to him.)

And with the Rokudaime gone, Naruto’s stare zeroed into them. 

In his periphery, Shikamaru saw Sakura squirm uncomfortably under the Hokage’s gaze. In fact, he could feel Sasuke’s eyebrow twitching incessantly behind his bangs. He really couldn’t blame them. The Advisor himself was getting a little bit antsy by the moment. 

He heard Naruto intake a sharp breath. 

"So you mean to say--" Naruto calmly began as he pinned the trio with a pointed stare. 

( _That_ was definitely not a good sign. Shikamaru had a very, very bad feeling about this.) 

"--that you gave me a _freaking_ concussion--" Sakura winced, absolutely ashamed "--destroyed my door, wrecked my desk, ruined my _signed papers_ , and talked about burning me _alive_ \--" 

This time, Sasuke fidgeted perceivably, obviously _torn_ between Body flickering away (read: escaping) and defending his honor. 

(In the future, when all else failed, Naruto would truly regret not letting the Uchiha cast the Amaterasu. This could have saved him from the torture and humiliation of the meeting-my-younger-self-fiasco. Plus, death meant no paperwork which is a big bonus).

"--all because I was doing my _bloody job_?!" Naruto ended in a shriek, causing the trio to flinch at his loudness (and guilt).

Unfortunately, Naruto was nowhere near done. 

“ _All these years--_ ” Naruto began, eyes narrowing seethingly “--all these _fucking_ years, you've tormented me to finish my _paperworks_ \--" He hissed the last word venomously as if it was a _curse_ “--and now that I'm doing it, just like what you guys wanted. You're actually _questioning_ my actions?! Just--”

By this point, none of them could look at the Hokage straight in the eye. Even Shikamaru had to admit it was a _valid_ point. Something not entirely impossible for Naruto to come up with, just a little bit... _unusual._

“-- _what the hell is wrong with all of you._ ” The Hokage fumed breathlessly, demanding for an answer.

Luckily (for the trio), Kakashi chose this moment to arrive with a ruffled Yamato in tow. Instantly, the latter was shoved in front of the _pissed_ Blonde and his wrecked desk as a consolation (read: sacrifice), ignoring the Wood User's baffled expression at the _tense_ atmosphere. 

By some miracle, Naruto's fuse seemed to dissipate at the sight of his other teacher. The rest took it as a good sign as Yamato felt a _hard_ nudge on his back, mentally sending a glare to the culprit (aka Kakashi).

Hesitantly, he offered. "So… umm, do you want to repair _that_ or…just--" 

"--please make me a new one, Yamato-taicho. I doubt what _Sakura-chan_ did to my desk is even _salvageable_." 

Predictably, this caused the Medic-Nin to flinch. Not wanting to be caught in the fray, the Wood User started to create a new table for their Hokage. 

With a heavy sigh, the Blond began to pick up his papers in despair. "I…I just finished signing this--" Naruto whimpered, utterly broken “--and now, I have to do it all over, _again._ ”

“And _you_ \--” his three offenders and (useless) teacher straightened up “--If I have to do _everything_ again, then I don't want _any of you_ here in this room.”

When Sasuke was about to protest, the Hokage cut in. “Yamato-taichou can stay if you’re so worried about me _doing_ my job--"

"I'd really rather not." The Wood User piped in.

(Yamato would prefer not to deal with the consequences of their actions. Naruto might have gone a long way from the naive teenager he supervised. 

_But_... 

Their Hokage could still be a _brat_ sometimes. Listening to the Blonde’s whining would be a nightmare. He’d rather keep his sanity intact. Thank you very much.

Unfortunately, his pleas fell into deaf ears.) 

"--And in case you’ve forgotten--” the Blonde eyed the Uchiha critically “--I’ve got _your_ Anbu watching me.” 

At the Hokage’s accusing tone, the Uchiha’s eyebrow twitched.

“Just...just _please_ leave before you add more paperwork.” Naruto ended wearily (read: pleadingly). 

Deeming this moment to be a tactical time for retreat, Shikamaru intervened before anyone could comment otherwise. “Then, we’ll leave you to your...duties, Naruto. And we--” rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly “--apologize for the _disturbance."_

And with that, the trio (and Kakashi) left, not bothering to wait for the Hokage’s response.

* * *

_A few minutes later..._

When the duo finished stacking the Hokage’s paperwork in his newly conjured desk, Naruto felt the Wood User wriggle slightly as he backed away.

Instantly, his ex-sensei declared. “I’ll be going now, Naruto.” 

“But, aren’t you--”

“--I’m positive you don’t need one anymore. See yah.” Yamato-taichou countered hastily.

And he was gone.

Naruto blinked at the empty spot left by the Wood User. Nevertheless, he shrugged it off as he glared at the resurrected towers of reports on his desk. 

Reminiscing the earlier events, the Hokage inwardly smirked. 

He couldn’t believe Shikamaru, of all people, actually fell for his _act._ For a second, the Blonde was actually worried by their silence but it was no doubt that their body language screamed _guilty_ , which was absolutely hilarious to be seen in the Uchiha and his Advisor. Maybe Naruto should pursue something related to Theatre Arts when he travelled back, seeing as how it fooled even the _smartest Nara._

It was painfully obvious that the most logical conclusion they would come up with was that _he’s a clone._ So why not throw everyone off by being _real_ and instruct a clone to do his research? 

Of course, Naruto also prepared the necessary measures should anyone investigate him. All of his researches were hidden in Mt. Myōboku, which nobody aside from _him_ has access to. 

The Hokage mentally cackled. Being a sole summoner of the Toads sure has its perks. His friends had absolutely underestimated him, which worked only in his favor.

But _damn_.

Sakura-chan’s punch hurt like hell. If it wasn’t for Kurama’s healing, Naruto’s positive he’ll end up in the hospital - _comatose_. Still, at least it did the trick. 

Needless to say, a probable brain damage was nothing he couldn't handle all for the sake of the greater good (read: no paperwork life). Hence, Operation ‘ **Getting the Devil and his minions out of his back** ’ was a success.

(Really, Naruto should have known that his Advisor could never be fooled that _easily._ )

* * *

_Somewhere..._

Shikamaru was pondering over their interactions with Naruto. 

He never claimed to be always right, but he was _rarely_ wrong. Another thing that's rubbing him the wrong way was the Hokage's _argument_. It's not that Naruto was incapable of rational thought. In fact, he wouldn't be a Kage if he wasn't. However, in all his years of knowing the Blonde, he could attest that Uzumaki Naruto was _never_ a rational individual when it involved paperwork. Adding up the Blonde’s newly-found dedication to _do_ his reports in peace, it could only be an _elaborate ruse_ to shake them off.

Whatever their Hokage is planning, the Nara swore. 

_He will find out._

* * *

**PREVIEW OF THE NEXT CHAPTER:**

"He's _clean_." Sasuke gritted out.

At that, the rest of the Gang audibly sighed in disappointment. _That_ was actually their last lead where Naruto could have hidden his plans.

"So another dead end." Sakura commented ruefully.

"You know--" Tenten began "--it's possible that we're all just overthinking about this. Maybe he did have a change in heart?" She offered hesitantly.

Multiple snorts were heard across the room. 

"But there's nothing--"

"--No wait." Shikamaru abruptly interrupted "There's still one place we haven't checked yet."

At their confused and eager gaze, the Nara replied. 

_"Mt. Myōboku."_

* * *

_**To Be Continued...** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Again!
> 
> I know most of you are excited with younger Naruto and Hokage Naruto's interaction. I really wanted to write that part already but... it felt like it needed some development first? Hopefully, this chapter didn't disappoint any of you and the humor was there. Please let me know your thoughts about this.
> 
> Once again, thank you so much and stay safe 💕
> 
> PS. Please note that the preview of the next chapter might change in terms of wording. But the thought is still the same.


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